It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
