Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize