I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Your penis caused this!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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