$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
