Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
