I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
