whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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