Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
