Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
