You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
