We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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