4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
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