More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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