Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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