You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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