When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
