Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
