got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
