Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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