We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize