I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
