I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize