i just wanna soil my oats bro
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
