Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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