Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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