how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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