we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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