Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize