addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
