in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
