Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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