I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
