I wannas sexs uuuuu
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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