he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
