People in love make me want to vomit
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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