lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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