He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
