Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Randomize
