awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Randomize
