I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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