I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize