I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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