id be glad to
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
