I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
