dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
