he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
worst night to have a conscience
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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