So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize