I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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