i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
