They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
