You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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