I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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